Stuff that pops into my head. Innit.

Friday, 4 June 2010

Huang Jianxiang

Although this sounds like something I'd eat with noodles, it is in fact the name of a Chinese sports commentator.Why am I blogging about a Chinese sports commentator? Good question. well, this commentator is a bit special, to say the least. Here's his rant from the 2006 World Cup, when Italy were up against the country of my birth, Australia.

Huang's rant

"Penalty! Penalty! Penalty! Grosso's done it! Grosso's done it! Don't give the Australians any chance."
"The great Italian left back! He succeeded in the glorious traditions of Italy! Facchetti, Cabrini and Maldini, their souls are infused in him at this moment! Grosso represents the long history and traditions of Italian soccer; he's not fighting alone at this moment! He's not alone!!"
"Totti, Totti is facing the spot kick. He is facing the expectations from Italian soccer fans all over the world."
"Schwarzer has saved two spot kicks in the World Cup qualifying tournaments, both of these were during the playoffs of the world cup qualification. Totti should have known this. Will he still be able to face the man in front of him with a smile? How about his expression after 10 seconds?"
"Goooooal! Game over! Italy win! Beat the Socceroos! They do not fall in front of Hiddink again! Italy the great! Italian left back the great! Long live Italy! Happy birthday to Maldini!! Forza Italia!!"
"He didn't let the Italians down. This penalty kick was an absolute one-off! Absolute one-off! Italy have made the final eight!"
"The victory belongs to Italy, to Grosso, to Cannavaro, to Zambrotta, to Buffon, to Maldini, to everyone who loves Italian soccer!!"
"The Socceroos might regret, Hiddink! He played too conservatively and too calmly with one more player (than Italy) in the second half, he lost all his courage. Faced with the long history and traditions of Italian soccer, he didn't attack as fiercely as he did in the group matches. He finally reaped fruits which he had sown! They should go home. They don't need to go as far away as Australia as most of them are living in Europe. Farewell!"

Magnificent. Although I wouldn't have been that pleased if I'd heard it at the time, as I was in a bit of a sulk anyway.
Oh, in the last week this guy has been appearing dressed as an American Indian- close enough to a zulu eh?
What a star.

No comments: